I write from the premise that the past is not a prophet; at best, it is only a teacher. So, what has the past taught us?

• This newsletter contains a slogan I wrote 39 years ago. Yet, I still use it today to keep me stable when in a transition.
• What we ignore.
• Wisdom for the journey.
• One more thing.

When I turned 70, I retired. I thought that would be the last time in my life that I would be in transition. Wow, was I wrong. In my eighties, I'm again transitioning. My wife lives miles from me in a memory care facility. Still in love but separated. Transitions present themselves even in aging.
Here are my thoughts on what sustains me.

5 Great Responses When You Are Looking for Answers

We have all been there.

Lost a job.
A marriage went kaput.
Close friends drifted away.

What could go wrong… did.

Be careful not to react.

Instead, put structure into your response to the difficult and trying circumstances you face.

The Psalmist, King David, reminds us not to lose heart but to be of good courage:

Thirty-nine years ago I wrote these five choices to gain a much more in-depth perspective on trudging through the muck of despair.

5 Great Choices in Transition

1. Refocus by analyzing the complete picture.
2. Realize what I still have, not just what was lost.
3. Recognize I cannot control the uncontrollable.
4. Reduce unnecessary stress by learning to say “no.”
5. Regain and keep my sense of humor.

When the company I worked for over 22 years closed in 1987, I was despondent at first.

But I soon realized my life was not over.

I grabbed hold of my optimism and began pursuing new opportunities.

What I had was greater than what I lost.

My wife, my children, and my faith carried me through.

One habit helped. I had set aside money for uncertain times. That cushion mattered.

No matter how much I grieved the loss, I could not change it.

It was out of my control.

No amount of complaining would alter the situation.

But my attitude? That was still mine.

Instead of a fist, I chose open hands. I was ready for new possibilities.

I also had to learn the power of saying no.

Not every opportunity was the right one. Turning down “not-so-good” options made room for better ones.

And just as important. I picked my friends carefully.

I didn't need negative voices to pull me down. Positive ones helped me stand.

And a little levity goes a long way.

I decided on cheerfulness over discontentment. It didn’t erase the hardship, but it lifted the weight of it.

Scripture puts it this way:

The slogan behind my writing is simple:

Choices Made ~ Action Taken ~ Makes Us.

You have an opportunity right now for change to take place in your life.

Whatever difficulty you’re facing… you still have a choice.

In fact, you have five of them.

Which one will you start with?

Those five choices made all the difference in my life.

They can help break the chain of loss and despair, but only if you put them into practice.

When in transition, always believe in a better outcome.

What we ignore grows.

Turn Your Radio On​
​Some problems don’t go away. We get better at not hearing them.​
​

My car has a noise when I’m driving. I’m not exactly sure what’s causing it.
But when I turn the radio on, I don’t hear it anymore.
Issue solved, right? Smooth jazz can do that.
But of course. It hasn't fixed a thing.
It covers the sound.
This made me think, how often do we do the same thing in life?
Something isn’t right. A relationship feels strained. A conversation needs to happen. A wrong needs attention.
And we know it.
Because, deep down, we’ve already known it.
Call it conscience. Call it the “Spirit of God.”
Either way, we recognize that quiet tap on the shoulder.
Yet instead of dealing with it, we turn the radio on.
We distract ourselves. We stay busy. Not only that, but we also put it off for another day.
Anything but face what we already know we should do.
Fixing what’s broken takes effort. It takes humility. At times it means going first. Even when the other person hasn’t.
That’s not easy. But it is right.
And more often than not, it’s where God is already at work. Turning the radio on is easier.
Yet avoidance doesn’t solve anything. It delays the cost.
And over time, we lose.
Today is a good day to turn the radio off. And listen.
​I’ve found that peace doesn’t come from avoiding the noise. But from doing what was needed.

So, what are you putting off until tomorrow?

Wisdom for the journey.

I only have control over what is or what's not happening in my life.

What happens outside this one truth does not hasten to my control.

Maybe a little but not earth-shattering.

This one thought settled in my mind. I once again realized that what is happening all around me I have little control over. But what is happening in my soul? I can make the corrections needing to be made.

This will keep me busy enough without me trying to change the world.

One more thing.

It is what it is.

That's what I heard the 82-year-old lady say. I'll call her Doris. She had Alzheimer's disease. Her health was declining, and she knew it. For years Doris had avoided thinking about what the disease would do to her. Then one day Doris faced this terrible disease and said,

“It is what it is.”

I was seated beside her in the memory cafe meeting. I had known her for over a year. Most times in our group meetings, she was negative and showed her frustration about her condition. With a sense of anger. But this day was different. She made it clear. She was not giving up. Instead, she had become fully aware of the downward trend of this insidious disease. Doris had changed. In our discussions around the table, she opened up. She raised her hand and said with a twinkle of joy in her voice,

“It is what it is.” Doris definitely was determined to live out her remaining days with a renewed resilience.

Often we think ignoring our symptoms will lessen the progression of what we're experiencing. Believe me, it will not. Admitting what is happening does not ensure that it will happen. That's an erroneous teaching. Discard it. Acknowledgement of the downward trajectory of the disease gives us the power to change. Just as Doris did. Enough said. The lesson is:

Change before the change changes you.

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